Authenticity Misunderstood: Why being authentic doesn’t automatically translate into leadership effectiveness
In part two of this three-part series we explore how authenticity has been misunderstood in the workplace, and why it’s much less about being yourself than becoming yourself.
We have all heard it: “Just be yourself”. Advice that sounds reassuring but is actually confusing, and in some cases, can undermine leadership effectiveness.
Does being yourself mean being authentic?
The short answer is: Not quite.
Authenticity, along with relational agility and elasticity, is one of the three Elastic Intelligence meta-capacities. It is also a workplace concept du jour that is widely referenced yet often misunderstood and misused.
Today, we will explore how authenticity is commonly misinterpreted, what authenticity actually is, and why becoming authentic requires intentional authorship rather than impulse.
Authenticity is not impulse
Authenticity ≠ being yourself: “Being yourself” reflects your current self-concept - what you know about yourself right now.
Authenticity ≠ unfiltered honesty: It is not radical transparency or unfiltered expression without regard for impact.
Authenticity ≠ feelings are truth: Acting authentically does not mean accepting our feelings and thoughts as truth and acting on them undiscerningly. And it is certainly not staying within our comfort zone.
What authenticity is
Authenticity runs deeper. It’s about aligning with our deepest values and highest potential.
This is where authenticity becomes paradoxical: Real authenticity is uncovered and constructed. It emerges through a learning journey as we decouple from external influences and expectations. It is about becoming yourself.
Becoming authentic enables us to leave our mask behaviors – people pleasing, boundary collapse, and choosing comfort over courage – behind. It also strengthens our authentic voice, which elevates self-trust, over our ego voice. The ego voice is an inner dialogue that prioritizes safety and is driven by fear, comparison, the need for control, approval, and protection.
Authenticity and effectiveness at work
An common misunderstanding in modern leadership is the assumption that authenticity automatically translates into effectiveness at work.
That’s only true to a point.
On the one hand, authenticity can help us choose work and environments that align with our values. When our work reflects what we care about, it becomes easier to act in ways that feel congruent – our behavior and our beliefs reinforce each other. In that sense, authenticity increases the likelihood of creating real impact, because we are operating from conviction rather than compliance.
But that kind of alignment alone doesn’t make us effective. Authenticity still requires relational skill, context-awareness, and discernment. We must be intentional about how we position ourselves, how we interact with others, and how we express our authenticity.
Authenticity becomes ineffective when we use it to justify unregulated emotion, rigidity, or self-focus.
For example, sharing political opinions in an unfiltered way - or demanding that a workplace conform to them - may feel authentic but can still be inappropriate or counterproductive in a professional setting.
Authenticity also becomes ineffective when we use it to justify emotional oversharing – venting frustration, expressing anxiety, or offloading stress onto colleagues in the name of being ‘real.’ While the emotion may be honest, the impact can be destabilizing for a team.
Another common trap is using authenticity to defend rigidity: ‘This is just how I am.’ In practice, this often masks avoidance, inflexibility, or an unwillingness to adapt – behaviors that erode trust and collaboration.
As author Tomas Chamorro-Prezmuzic writes: “It’s not authenticity, but knowing where the right to be you ends and your obligation to others begins, that makes you effective in work settings”.
Authenticity requires authorship
As I explore more fully in my longer essay on Authenticity Scaffolding, the journey toward becoming authentic isn’t intuitive - it requires authorship with structure, intention, and practice.
When we haven’t yet met our authentic self, “Does this feel authentic?” can become a trick question. Worse, it may default us into the very mask behaviors we are trying to outgrow. To become and construct our authentic-self, we need a scaffolding. And over time, our authenticity scaffolding also helps us develop self-trust and self-confidence, which keep us steady even as we grow.
Authenticity grows through a progression of capacities:
Self-awareness: observing our emotions, thoughts, and physical sensations without identifying with them, treating them as data rather than directives.
Self-acceptance: a clear-eyed acknowledgment of our strengths, limitations, and imperfections without distortion or avoidance.
Values clarity: identifying the principles that guide our decisions today – while allowing them to evolve as we do.
Choosing courage over comfort: intentionally leaning into small, meaningful stretches that expand our emotional range and reinforce resilience.
Over time, these practices compound into self-confidence and self-trust, the deeper knowing that we can meet challenges, adjust course, and stay grounded in who we are becoming.
This scaffolding keeps us steady as we grow – until eventually, the scaffolding becomes part of the structure itself.
Next in the Series
In the next essay, we’ll explore a related concept that is equally misunderstood - and equally essential to growth: vulnerability.
If there are other concepts you think are misused in the workplace, I’d love to hear them.